; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
he kept looking at my chin until i asked why, then he just said he was making sure his balls didnt leave a mark.
Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
i wish sherlock holmes were still around today... he'd be able to find my g-spot.
it felt like a thousand fairies were licking my balls.
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
If there was a god I would have a big mac right now, but i don't
hey dont come home for a while, moms drunk and is telling the story of 'how she met dad at that orgy' again
Dont worry about the blood on the pillow. its from my face.
he made a bald eagle out of coke lines
I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay.
I gave the naked guy in the hotel a pop tart. He stopped crying.
I see your walk of shame and raise you a day in jail wearing a girls old workout clothes.
You should help rebuild my confidence with your dick. Altruism: Pass it on.
woke up this morning and she was gone. but she left a box of donuts on the counter with a note saying "for all the 'o's you gave me last night"
Randomize