I'm actually glad you're quitting. Now there's one less person at work who's seen me naked.
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
Sry I came all over your dress. Think of it as a Vegas souvenir.
I told my mom about how you got white girl wasted and sobbed about Whitney Houston. She sends her condolences.
tell her thanks so much
Whoever said that remembering a girls name is a basic rule for getting laid has never met me.
You drink it until you puke in a vent one time and it's ruined forever.
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
I don't think he understands that his kid doesn't bother me. I have a binder full of developmentally appropriate early childhood activities.
Either go for divorced men who are forty plus or stop doing this immediately. You are 23 years old. You need more wine and less baby fever
I walked in on him fucking her whilst she ate skittles. I saw things no one should see, but I did get your bra back. You owe me.
you went over there?
His drunk texts were grammatically perfect. At least our kids will be smart.
your fucking longboard fell on me while we were having sex you fucking hipster
Randomize
