is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
I tried to explain to him that we just wanted a stereotypical black friend to be in our group. He didn't take it too well... Never take me to the bar again.
you handled that situation with as much grace as someone puking involuntarily could
i just wanna lock my vagina in a safe filled with bandaids and healthy things
That's like rubbing a penis in my face and not giving it to me.
This is so pathetic it makes me miss snorting lines alone in my room listening to 'one more drink'.
Other than a hickey from some random Canadian roller derby girl, I came out unscathed
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
I don't hate him I just hate being present to see him consume 80 dollars worth of alcohol and then try to tip people with left over money on a Walmart gift card
... drunk me broke the coffee table?
STOP TALKING ABOUT YOURSELF IN THE THIRD PERSON. YOU DID THE THING.
Apparently I made a chicken patty, angrily took it out of the microwave, walked outside, and threw it over the balcony. #me
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
just used my $120 dollar stats book for the first time to kill an ant... good thing i stole it
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