I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
Someone just told me I have an ass that could kill small children .... Don't know how to take that one
i just snorted adderall with my patient's rolled up EKG strip from our last clinical. nursing school has ruined me. thought you would appreciate this.
Before I roll over explain to me why you're naked and on my floor.
At this point I will cuddle anything to prevent from dying alone
The car just stinks of weed and we are all sitting here trying to hide it from my mom by rolling down the windows, like it's not coming off my sisters boyfriend
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
I'll have you know my trust issues and my daddy issues are two COMPLETELY different topics of conversation.
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
"Being an adult" and "being happy" are two circles that do not overlap in my Venn diagram of life.
This is a life or shit situation. Grab me toilet paper asap. This bathroom is fucking out. This is not a test. This an actual emergency and I am not joking.
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
I used to want you to marry him...Now I just think you deserve a bigger penis than that.
.......do you have the salami in bed? I'm trying to make a sandwich.
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