We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
There is a pube in my fucking eyeball
VODKAVODKAVODKAYESSSS
I have discovered that there is nothing that a giant penis attached to a southern accent can't talk me into. yee-haw!
Kristy will be communicating through my phone. Due to her current blood alcohol level, the laws of Pennsylvania, Erie county, and common decency have deemed that she is no longer permitted to have her own phone.
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
Lying naked in bed eating carrot cake of off my bare breasts while watching Family Guy. Tonsilitis isn't all bad!
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
a girl walked up to me and asked if you were my brother. she shook her head and said 'im so sorry' when i said yes. what did you fucking do????????
Apparently "Welcome to the Sin Cave" is not how I'm supposed to answer the door
someone stole my phone at the bar last night, naturally, it led to me waking up in the bartender’s bed
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
Who fucking spams baby shark at a sports bar
Randomize
