She said she had a thing for dinosaurs. Come get me now
They're donating plasma together for extra money. Couple of the fucking century.
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
This girl brought half a watermelon to class. I want to be on her level.
Don't ask me how or why, but I'm drunk with German diplomats. Come over. Now
Come over, we're having a tea party. And by a tea party I mean we're drinking whiskey from tea cups.
I'm in the freezer. Shit took away any trace of hangover outa my body.
I just passed a kid trying to leave on a lawn mower
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
Yeah he drove 30 minutes at 3 AM to come fuck me in my neighbors treehouse
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
You are the epitome of what awesome would taste like.
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
If he has a beard, chances are, that’s an open invitation to sit on his face
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
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