JOSHUA! WE ARE SO BREAKING UP!
what?
YOU'RE DRUNK AGAIN, ARENT YOU?!
She actually said during sex "the only thing that would make this more perfect is if we were listening to Lenny Kravitz"
So, obviously, you had to give a fake number this morning.
Yes. Also, we may never be able to go back to that bar again.
How fortunate humanity is that it need not rely on the female orgasm for procreation
We hung out in the bathroom the whole time and talked about sex and watched some girl pee. If you don't believe I was there, check the bathtub for bread crust.
you're wrong. we DID have sex last night. just ask your roommate. you seriously don't remember him asking to join us?
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
My gynecologist inadvertently complimented your penis.
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
That's the point of day drinking, get fucked up by 6pm so you can get stuff done the next day. It's the adult thing to do.
I'm sexting at the thanksgiving dinner table...this is a new holiday tradition.
You keep saying things....but all I'm hearing is kegs
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
One of my favorite March activities is cropdusting people while wearing a kilt.
Went to bed in my room fully clothed, woke up naked in the kitchen with the dog looking unamused.
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
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