Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
I got kicked out of a mexican restaurant last night for being too drunk. This is getting dangerously close to rock bottom
Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
Well I pulled a muscle in my leg dancing in the tanning booth drunk at 1 pm soooo there's that
I WALKED myself out of breath. And I'm lost I'm a Tim Hortons parking lot. That's how hungover I am.
just had a very awkward conversation with the concierge at the hotel, they threw your underwear out
I'm at his house right now making him pancakes to compensate for YOU not giving him a handjob last night. You're welcome.
I wish buying curtains was as easy as buying drugs. I already KNOW what I want and what the outcome will be: awesome.
Thank you. Next to bondage, soft American Apparel t-shirts are the best things you've taught me about.
Trying to do the walk of shame over here WHY are there a hundred ppl on the el?! Thank god I pulled a summit and wore casual clothes I even stopped by the farmers market and bought some squash
I need to stop acting like a drunk bitch. People are going to get the right idea about me...
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
I left him naked in his bed. I did cover his junk with a blanket in case his roommate walked in later though. so I don't feel as bad about it.
On a scale of 1 to 10, with 1 being “good” and 10 being “banging a student’s father”, how bad is it that I’m banging a student’s father?
Randomize
