Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
DAMN! I hate it when i drunkenly erase all my "sent message" and wake up in the morning and my inbox is full of "WTF?" and "Huh?" messages.
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
she passed on me to fuck the foreign guy. is there a manlier, slightly less gay way of saying "always the bridesmaid, never the bride"?
nope.
I just found like 5 packs of sparklers. If someone doesn't get set on fire tonight I am retiring from party hosting.
In my drunkeness I was planning how to throw up without my parents hearing. I was gonna go for a "run" and just throw up outside.
I have so much shit FLYING through my head. They're all in magic carpets and everything
He just asked me if I wanted a ride on the "bologna pony." I never wanna have sex again...
WHAT KIND OF DUMPSTER DOESNT HAVE PIZZA IN IT?
Woke up Christmas Eve morning with my face smelling like ballsack.. No regrets.
I think 2012 will be the year I purposely put myself in awkward situations. Much like 2011 but really trying this time. Like fucking the little sister of a girl I already fucked and dating a chick that lives with her ex. It could be awesome or horrible.
I hate when you actually try to sing and people think you're joking so you just go with it, but on the inside you're crying.
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
and yet oddly the jello shots tasted better coming up than going down
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