Dude, she literally stopped, mid fuck said "I want soup" got off my dick and make top ramen.
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
You know Im horny if Im walking around in my lingerie and sex robe. It's my field of dreams mentality. If I wear it, he will come.
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
He just showed me how to break a chop stick with his ass.
Pounded a bottle of Moscato in my underwear while watching Pretty Little Liars...am I really gonna be 30 next year?
i would compare it to sliding down a velcro-covered fireman's pole naked. no more bearded men for me.
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
Good friends chat about sex - great friends ask about safe words.
I told him I was ready for another round and he said, "after this part." What guy chooses James Bond over pussy?!
is it fucked up if I wear crotchless panties to thanksgiving to make it easier for me to fuck my cousins friend.
God I love you.
Its really awkward pooping while on videochat. Even if you turn the video off.
I just bought a handle of tequila and a breakfast burrito. I might be out of money for the weekend, but at least I have the necessities covered.
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
Randomize
