C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
we were going to warn you, but we veto-ed that idea somewhere between "this is the stupidest thing we've ever done" and "let's order a pizza"
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
you woulda been proud of me tonight though. i only made out with 2 guys. and in my defense one of them was to get a job after graduation.
We convinced him to snort an altoid. We should not be allowed to drink together
Oh so it was one of those "I shouldn't have gotten in a cab with a random 21 year old girl" kinda nights.
this must be what syphilis tastes like
First day of class and I'm in a bar drinking pitcher #3. Foreshadowing?
I have Denny's hours of operations written on the palm of my hand....not in my writing, in a girls writing, is that as good as or equal to a cell number?
And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize
No more house parties. We're almost fucking 30 years old and I slept until 6 pm.
When the sex is so good, you need three fans and have to chug a gallon of water after
I'M GOING TO DIE ALONE WITHOUT ANYONE PRETENDING TO BE A MARRIED COUPLE WHILE DRUNK AT A MALL WITH ME
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
Randomize
