People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
You are too young to settle down enjoy your life. The window to get drunk and have casual sex with strangers gets smaller by the day.
I just saw a wasted dude crawl out of the road at 2 in the afternoon. Big question- still drunk from the weekend or hitting the soju already?
Michelle asked what I was wearing tonight. I responded with a g-string and plastic wrap. I've gotten no response since.
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
My mom just told me my dad shaves his pubes while drunk and I don't know how to feel anymore.
Did you really get 12 corn dogs from the gas station last night?
OMG BTW REMEMBER HOW HE ORDERED PIZZA THAT ONE TIME WE HOOKED UP. APPARENTLY HE WAS HANDING IT OUT TO PEOPLE WHO LIVE IN MY BUILDING AS HE WAS LEAVING
And we had three hours of crazy sex then his roommate ate pizza off me while I was sleeping.
Reminder: You could have had sex with me while wearing a tiara.
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
GO RIDE HIS EYEBROWS INTO THE SUNSET
HE PEED ON ME. THE MANAGER OF THE BAR.
You went outside, peed in the front yard, and asked me to bring you some toilet paper.
Randomize