therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
I woke up face down on my laptop with three windows open: itunes, chat roulette and redtube
His dick was poking my bladder. That big...
6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
Just think, this time last Cinco de Mayo you were holding me up and finding me passed out in the yard of that house.
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
Woke up in her bed this morning with a half used condom stuck to the side of my face
How can a condom be "half used"?
I'm putting my hangover kit in my car for the trip to work tomorrow morning. Dedication
8 stitches. Next time I decide to twerk while doing a keg stand, stop me.
Just taxi'd to the airport holding a zip lock bag of my own vomit. Bachelorette success.
I accidentally gave my prayer card to the bouncer. Clearly a cry for help #saveme
Plus my parents would be pissed if I spent Thanksgiving in jail... again.
I basically spent the entire weekend in bed with that red head.Every time I tried to leave she got me too horny to think straight. I was kidnapped by vagina
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