If a guy called my cleavage "mesmerizing" but is kinda related to me, does it still count?
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
Never get a handjob from a girl who gives deep tissue massages.
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
just leaving uw hospital. they thought i had franzia-induced appendicitis. whaaaaat
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
do you remember the combo for the lock to my pants?
this is not the first time I've had hot dogs and 151 for thanksgiving.
There's a picture of you on facebook laying in the street with 3 cops standing over you after you faceplanted off that guy's shoulders.
Is that what happened to my face?!
My cousin is passed out in my room, so I just masturbated in my walk-in closet. Apparently I get off on danger. Make note of that.
All I need to do is acquire a Shrek costume.
Please don't traumatize your girlfriend too terribly. Have fun.
People trash cargo shorts, but I'm like, sorry I had room for beers and you didn't.
Let the clothes fall where they may.
Thanks for driving us home last night. Also, blanket apology for anything I may have said/done. I blacked out sometime near the t-shirt cape incident
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