You know you want to come over later
1:27a: Um no
1:45a: Maybe
2:05a: Probably
2:38a: I'm outside, let me in
Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
you missed kickoff and the first round of bodyshots. I suggest you get here now.
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
Mystery lines found in a Pyrex dish in the back of my pantry at 415 am. No recall as to it's origin. Unidentifiable taste. Obviously I'm doing them
Just saw you drinking out of a flask on national tv. I've never been more proud of you
No, this is a senior booty call. It cannot be ignored.
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
Do not deep throat a rocket pop, it WILL go into your lungs, and you may die.
My day so far: morning after pill and pancakes. Living the dream.
THE FASTEST WAY TO MY HEART IS THROUGH FAMILY SIZED BAGS OF GENERIC BRAND CHEESE BALLS
Babe, Have you see my pants?
Try Jay street in Brooklyn.. that's where I last remember seeing them.
I love you man but my hope is that you will not wake me up again by pissing on me
She was going down on me before I had a chance to tell her I arrested her brother 3 hours earlier
Randomize
