after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
I just used dish soap as body wash. I smell like a dishwasher exploded. isn't the end of the semester fun?
side note. good thing you didn't come to drunk breakfast. we were judged by children.
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
Dude, the lecture theatre is caving in on me.
Who am I sleeping next to in your bed? Where are you? Also when are you coming home... I need coffee.
Drunk naked twister. My place. Heath is trying to use his dick as a third leg.
So heartbroken my rebound has a rebound
We turned a watering can into a margarita bong.
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
Dude!! Who the fuck glued Cheetos to my couch? Bastards!!
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
I woke up thinking it was Friday. I was disappointed (to say the least). I am pretty sure I have gained the quarantine fifteen (but I won’t know until I try to put something other than elastic-waisted shorts on). And I am probably going to need dentures because I am grinding my teeth so much. But hey--this is temporary, right?
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
Randomize