The guy in front of me in line at Starbucks looks kinda like Danica Patrick except he has a huge boner.
this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
Dude you called me last night to let me listen to you piss in a cup and drink it. Just making sure you survived
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
Nope if you can't be there for me emotionally, then my vagina can't be there for you physically. That's my rule.
Oh and someone pissed in my shoes, so I'll let you figure that out.
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
Honestly I am too high to watch videos of you jerking off right now
He's gonna be like you slept with too many of my friends and you're being voted off the island haha
I think I puked in the middle of sex last night if that's any indication as to how drunk I was.
All my female reproductive organs were screaming HELL YES last night.
sorry for running off in the middle of that heart to heart. free food.
Eaten today: granola bar, pumpkin donut, and fritos. Oh, college nutrition.
Randomize
