Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
I've grown up since last year. I don't give blow jobs as birthday presents anymore.
Apparently my gaydar only works on americans. Frenchie capris has two topless chicks in our kitchen making him breakfast.
I thought i'd save money with No Heat November but the amount of whiskey i have to buy to stay warm is probably adding up to more than a heat bill.
let's get a trip to cabo together for next spring... they have to have forgotten about me by now
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
You can cross "give someone a blow job while playing Colors of the Wind" off my bucket list.
I hate him. I fucked every one of his friends AND his fat brother and he still won't break up with me.
The fact that he offered to stop once he stuck it in my ass was sadly the most considerate thing anybody's ever done for me.
The alcohol tastes like we did a beer run at the nail salon
don't bring your nerd jargon into this conversation about my naked body
I just swiped right for a guy on Tinder solely because it looked like he was holding Zoboomafoo
no fucks will be given and no pants will be worn
i'll bring the vodka
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
Randomize