Those balls look pretty dangerous.
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
Taking the airport shuttle drunk should not happen this often in my life.
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
I dunno if we should get high tonight man. its daylight savings. time travel is just too much for me right now.
Me+graduation party+hammered drunk+polish horseshoes in the dark= black eye, crying, pissed, passed out in my dress... How was your weekend?
I don't know what to tell you, usually I would just ask if they'd like to meet the captain. If you can't get laid it's your problem.
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
I WANT MY VAGINA TO POUND AT NICE THINGS.
Hey my results were negative. Your chlamydia train stops here. Happy hunting!
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
I just got fingered in the Win-Co parking lot for pills. How's your meltdown going?
He dropped some cash when he got in my front seat upside down. And a hat. I'm keeping them as retribution for not remembering that he had sex with me once before. Although, if he didn't have his dick pierced, I wouldn't have remembered either.
Do I have to cook for the potluck? Can I just bring a costco size bottle of Vodka?
Randomize
