I'm laying in your front yard are you home
I'm constantly one strobe light away from an E flashback
Just looked at my call log. I called Planned Parenthood at 3am.
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
Dude. Hurry up. They just blessed the tequila.
She gives me Chlamydia and somehow I'm still the asshole
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
I would feel worse for you if you weren't waking up between a pair of double Fs that attached to a classically trained chief. Im still jacking off eating hot pockets.
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
You mistakenly try to piss in a cactus bush ONE TIME and are forever dubbed cactus ass
Not at all! I'll let your potential employer know you have a huge dick
pizza hut and my weed lady just showed up at the same time. I feel 22 again.
I'm reading the Hobbit in my blanket fort alone with a bottle of wine... all I need is dungeons and dragons to complete this superfecta of awesome
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