the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
Why is there an empty beer bottle in the shower?
Why wouldn't there be.
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
I wasn't interested in him...but then he played The Office theme song on acoustic guitar. I'm sorry.
Come downstairs. Moms serving wine for breakfast again.
We got a Christmas tree, decorated it to surprise his wife And kids who were out of town for her father's funeral, then fucked like rabbits on their new mattress before he had to pick them up at the airport.
There is a girl on the metro with no shoes and she's using a Crown Royal bag as a purse.
He laid on the ground 100 ft from the car crying about how he just wanted to be home already
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
I'm too drunk to explain this to you. It's too hard.
I have aggressive nipples.
YOUR VAGINA IS SO CUTE IT'S LIKE A LITTLE MACAROON
Hey bro are you still alive??? I'm sure you are wondering how you ended up laying on the floor at the foot of your bed and why there is a wheelchair by your door....
And on the 323rd day without sex, God finally said let there be light...or love?
Randomize
