Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
Just realized the hot girl at the office got a boob job over the Holiday.....she is now super-hot girl.
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
You kept telling me how warm your bag of vomit was and asked me if i wanted to feel.
You know why nobody comes up with Sober October? Other than it's Oktoberfest? Because Sober October doesn't benefit anyone, just like your judgment isn't benefiting me. I'll talk to you in November. Unless you make up another alcoholless month.
Moonshine marathon is never a good idea
I'm 25 and I shit my bed last night. And I'm telling you about it. Not sure which is worse
Probably won't be invited back there again considering last time his purebred corgi ate my pot brownie and had to be rushed to the hospital.
You woke us up at 9:15 am still in your toga from last night saying "welcome to my house party...party". You had already filled up the pong cups with yaager/fireball and ordered a chicken platter... Who even delivered that that early???
AHHHHHHHHH. I LEFT A GLASS NEXT TO ME WHEN I FELL ASLEEP I'M SO SURE IT WAS WATER BUT NOW IT'S VODKA JESUS MADE A STOP
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
You do realize he's just an extension of his penis, right?
Shut the fuck up! I can hear you having sex over Pirates of the Caribbean you moaning whore.
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
I woke up next to a Big Mac box.. And had no sheets or clothes on. The night was a success I think.
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