White coat. Heels.
I solve my problems like an adult, at the strip club drinking on a work night.
I like that most of our conversations somehow end in us having sex for the good of our country
Need a travel agent to tell me which countries in Asia have legalized prostitution for New Year. Fireworks would be cool too.
this must be what syphilis tastes like
I'd like to believe that in some alternate universe we are living this wonderful lesbian life together..
True love: he brought me a margarita while was in the shower. He's a keeper.
It's the eve of Christ's birthday and I'm sending pictures of my tits
Funny you say that, I just sold my stripper pole to my mom tonight...
Okay I'm officially a Texan now, I banged a dude with cowboy boots
I just got woken up by that guy wearing a Krispy Kreme hat giving out donuts
That’s talent right there. Maverick and Goose type shit.
Thanks for DJing my sex last night. You were on point 💜
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
THEY'RE HAVING SEX ON A HORSE AND THE HORSE DOESN'T EVEN CARE.
Randomize
