the bouncer kept askin you for id just to see how long it would take you to find your pants
i stopped calling them hangovers and started calling mornings a long time ago.
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
Oh I already celebrated valentine's day. I stayed up until 4 AM listening to biggie, drinking rum, and caressing all my girl curves in front of the mirror. And then I came 3 times.
We just broke into a lion king sing along. Understanding is not possible.
My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
I was his one phone call from jail and I hung up on him. He's fine though were gonna go to a party now.
I was going to learn how to knit but I got high instead.
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
YOU SLEPT WITH A GUY WHO HAS A BILLBOARD IN HIS HONOR?
A drunk and bleeding peter is knocking on your door... in nothing more than a sombrero, boxers and cowboy boots.
Just did the "lost my phone, need #'s" post and I got a text saying "go ahead and save me as Ashley-DD because I know you will anyway. I think I love her.
Randomize