ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
i was unaware that anal sex sometimes ends with shit on the bed.
I never said you were fat, just too fat for ME
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
Mother fucker. I'm a 30J now. I'm fucking speechless
You kept spitting the skittles out cause you said they tasted like "balls of sandpaper"
So the coke mirror was perfectly angeled at my face right when i woke up this morning. I now know how I'd look on intervention.
you were mass sexting so we took your phone away
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
i'm about to tell me dad "sorry staying in isnt an option. i'm fucking a marine tonight."
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
You're supposed to discourage my sluttiness not bring me hot Colombian men
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
Hi I am on my way. I stopped and got the cheeseburger you asked for. Are you gonna pay me back?
Who is this?
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