Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
I found a ladder. I don't know where I am. Gonna climb it. I feel like aladin
Day drunk and a can of soup and wine straight from the bottle and alone and on my kitchen floor.
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
You know when you can feel the alcohol in your toes? That's a great feeling.
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
bro your seconds weren't very sloppy last night, is everything ok?
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
Been awake for 50 some odd hours. I've discovered I can spew out maaaad papers whilst coked out of my face. My roommates probably think I'm dead. Money well spent. You?
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
My brother is coming home and he is bringing a whole bunch of friends with him. I am making him a cake. What should i put on it?
"Open for business" or "I have condoms" would probably work
I don't like kids.
You were literally holding a baby 5 minutes ago
I like them before they learn to speak and after they learn to think.
Randomize
