"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
just took batteries out of my vibrator to play wii guitar hero. think i am gonna regret that move later tonight.
i made the cop pinkie-promise not to arrest me if i failed the breathalizer.
Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
he peed everywhere. it's like having a puppy.
This can't be good. I've realized that I weigh less in the morning after I have had a blackout drunk night than when I work out and eat healthy.
Drunk versus high capture the flag: what team is everybody gonna be on?
Shot gunning beers for breakfast. You better be ready for today.
I'VE CAME 4 TIMES TODAY. I AM AS DRY AS THE SAHARA, STOP YOUR WHINING.
Hardest I think I've ever had to work for a shack. Whatevs. Still gonna get my way though. I'll start respecting myself on Monday
went out last night. woke up with a lisp.
Just saw the bridesmaid use her new sister in law as a stripper pole
You opened the door to your apartment and shrieked "THE CHAIR IS GONE!" then punted a bag of votive candles
I had sex upstairs in my parents house, and my mom texted me and said "those raccoons are out of control in the walls."
I JUST HAD TO SNORT THE REST OF MY BAG OF COKE BECAUSE THE BAG RIPPED IN THE WORK BATHROOM.
I'm guessing you feel amazing due to all the caps?
LETS GET THIS SHIT DONE. IM GONNA GET THIS SHIT DONE, FOREVER.
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