Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
I have way too many pictures of poop on my phone
you should probably quit with the whole "no homo" thing, especially when you are drunk, "mo homo"gives the wrong impression.
Im dancing with my grandma to Low right now at the wedding. There's no coming back from this.
he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
I had to drink heavily last night because I needed to forget that you told me you want to blow my dad.
Its official, drinking for 15 hours counts as a suicide attempt
Dude. I only took a 20 out the ATM last night. How do I have 83 ones?
You stole from the strippers again. I wish I was ninja like you
Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
So I have been told that I licked your eyebrows last night
Too bad I can't un-pee in his body wash
I walked in on him pumping himself up by headbanging to the drumbeat from Jumanji.
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
Had a dick customer and the words "eat my ass" slipped out. He proceeded to lick his lips and say present it. I think it's time I quit.
Randomize
