i was puking in the toilet, he walked in and to talk to me and started puking in the sink.. Could this be my perfect man??
tonight, alcohol would be proud of us
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
His foreplay reminded me too much of breastfeeding.
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
you asked my brother if you could eat the cupcake that you found. you were showing him a baked potato
I'm pretty sure I did the Macarena with a gay guy while shot gunning a beer
Yeah then you killed that bottle of Bacardi in under 20 minutes. So much for being an organ donor.
I tried to trade my phone for pizza last night. I guess I had priorities last night
I'm giving head in a stairwell, I'll be back in a few minutes. I'm so ashamed.
I called you daddy and let you stick things in my butt, I am a damn 11.
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
Omg I just woke up in his bed.. I'm fully clothed and he is naked. I'm so confused.
i have paint on my face i'm missing my earrings, there's a bag of rice in my room, and i have a purse full of monopoly pieces
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