you looked like a weeble wobble. everytime we thought you were going to fall you bounced back up...you're an amazing drunk
you kept telling everyone that you were the mayor of silverware town
Either these are mashed potatoes in my pants, or I was drunker than I thought.
On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7
Did you get your crutches off the street sign?
It was drunk tag. I was Alice in wonderland chasing a ballerina who was chasing Lance Armstrong who had needles in his arms.
I realized after pounding back 151 and head banging into each other to "the drop" of that dub step song, that we weren't meant to have boyfriends at this point in time.
Somebody really needs to come home and pick up the used condom from the middle of the wood room floor. It's blue, if that helps decide who comes - uh, home.
It's times where you wake up in the hospital after trying to road surf that you wonder what you're doing in life.
Ah that wonderful moment when you realise the bookmark you were using in a book you lent your mum is actually a receipt from a strip club
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
Yeah I was just reminiscing about that time a seagull shit on your head at the beach
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
The amount of guys I've turned down for you is disgusting... You better love me.
you pulled out seven eyelashes and made me count them multiple times whilst crying hysterically.
Randomize
