First rule of pills: If you can't remember what it is, take half.
Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
Error 1684C: You're last text was undeeliverable. Subscriber is our to the aera.
the couple across the street's about to bang. go get the popcorn and come join us.
You drank the expired grape juice because you were convinced it had fermented into wine...you have a problem.
Zach says you can't see his penis until after we're married...not sure why?! Bt then he said he thinks maybe you already have on the wild animal night!
Defrosting my mini wheats in the microwave was a bad choice
no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
I'll be accepting presents in the forms of drinks, drugs, and orgasms. So any or all of those will be fine.
The first aid guy just told us to go get hammered...I'm taking his advice
We literally just Chinese fire drilled so I could give him road head.
we just drove past a kid stuck in a tree what a wonderful time to be alive
The angle I tried to shoot a load on her face was unfortunate. I accidentally came on the David Bowie tribute she had out. Oddly, that made it more erotic.
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
She was shaving her legs in the neighbors pool when we found her.
Where'd she get the razor?
Not the point.
Randomize
