Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
Im dancing with my grandma to Low right now at the wedding. There's no coming back from this.
He kept yelling "osteoporosis" and threw milk at her because she broke her arm.
He tried to make eye contact, he should know by now that freaks me out
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
Kurt said to text you and encourage you to come out tonight. Encourage you with my rack.
Huh. I think I went to highschool with the hooker my neighbor just brought home.
Please note: when a bouncer tells you to leave, pointing out that their career path makes them a much better judge what to do will not make you friends
Your life is one shit show away from being a lifetime movie.
I found a guy who will take me to the Olive Garden and he is CONVENTIONALLY ATTRACTIVE.
Would seriously like to slash his tires but then I feel like I'd have to deal with him longer.
Sitting in my junior high parking lot high on ambien talking to a stranger I met on tinder. What is life?
I swear I have some evil slut demon in me when I'm blacked out
Don't we all.
Somehow, walking in on your drunk mom in a diaper was the least traumatic thing I saw last night
Randomize
