is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
I just found 17 dollars of saltine crackers in my room. confused incredibly. suprised not at all.
just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
Escorted a stripper to her car last night,and all I got was a "Thanks" and "Go Steelers."
Hooked up with an Aussie chick last night only an Indonesian chick away from completing my lap around the pacific rim
She called my landing strip a "vagina mohawk"....
Lesbians are weird.
I'm watching my cat lick a used condom wrapper on my nightstand and I'm too hungover to move and do anything about it. Tequila Tuesdays can not be a thing.
I was peeing in the bathroom at this house party when a guy just casually stumbles out of the shower
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
I should not be this drunk in a place where a girl is wearing a princess dress
There was a comma in between her and dick. I was calling you a dick. Jesus.
the night literally screamed "cock and ball torture"
Woke up with an entire pizza face down in my bed beside me... untouched. Never beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
I will give him this, every time we go to the club he gets a stripper's actual number.
Randomize
