at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
I brought red and green boonsfarm to the white elephant party. classy and festive. I think this is what people are referring to when they talk about killing two birds with one stone.
Tell me the dirtiest joke you know
Sarah Palin
god, I love you
Just wandered into a surprise final. Only a surprise for me though. I wish I could say this is the first time this has happened.
Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
There is someone hissing in the hallway. Not even a typo. Not pissing. Hissing. Like a large cat. Or a komodo dragon.
i know it looks like there's pee in the mayo jar in the fridge but i promise it's just apple juice that wouldn't fit in the jug after i added the booze.
They ran out of toilet paper so I used the rug to wipe my vagina
Also, feel like I need to install a nanny cam to remind myself what I did the night before.
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
It's been three years since Kelly shit in the to go box that we put in Sam's mailbox after we broke up. Considering Sam and I are friends again, should I finally tell him?
It's sunday night and I just went to the store to buy cookie dough and condoms, I'm so proud of myself.
Who the fuck puts glitter on their vagina? It’s all over my face and crotch.
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