I just sold weed to a guy holding a baby...does this make me a bad person?
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
the best part about being a teacher is there are always 20 little kids around me to blame my farts on
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
Someone played tic tac toe on my abs?
I thought stuff was gonna go really bad after he filled the super-soaker with kerosene. but it all turned out pretty well.
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
If it's not soft enough to fuck on, then we're not getting the new rug.
wine pong. its mother daughter day and i think she's mad. I smell like jager
Dude. I'm super jealous I'm not there. Plus I look really pretty tonight, I'm wearing my long blue dress, I have long blonde hair, and I'm just sitting here hitting Larry the Long Bong. I'll pretend like your 3 spirits are floating in my smoke. Fuck.
Way too stoned bro. Was laying down on my back and thought for a good 30 mins what it would be like to be a turtle stuck on its shell
I dunno what the deal was, but you spent about an hour trying to put your phone charger in the outlet and you were yelling "one plug to rule them all"
This is my life. Enjoy the view
We got drunk, we had raw sex and we discussed about the showrunner change in Doctor Who, in that order.
What has my life become? I'be officially recruited my fuck buddy for help getting my ex back.
Randomize
