i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
Four minutes until I can fart!
I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
i've got to stop sleeping with short guys. they always turn into stage 5 clingers
Somehow I managed to make my Dunkin Donuts uniform look slutty. And I'm not even wearing hoops.
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
Missing part of a tooth cos I tried to open a beer with my teeth, just saw a dude that looked like bill Cosby though so things are looking up
Right now, millions of people are waking up to get ready for work, start their day, and be productive members of society. I just found a 40 stashed in my fridge. I'm getting daybreak drunk. Zero fucks are given.
Isn't being unemployed beautiful sometimes?
direct quote from andrew "you know i can't hear when i drink whiskey"
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
YOUR VAGINA IS SO CUTE IT'S LIKE A LITTLE MACAROON
I'm nothing if not determined to sleep with everyone at that company
Tell me why i'm looking through my medical records and the last thing it said about my labor was 'vagina was explored'!?
i need you to come over and tell me if you can notice that i'm only wearing a teddy underneath my trenchcoat
Randomize
