i was just at lovers lane looking for gifts for a bachelorette party.....with my mom
I just saw a pair of panties stretched over a fire hydrant on campus... I need to get the fuck out of this town
you know i'm gay cause i'd have sex with lady gaga. what straight man would say that?
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
seriously my hangover is so bad I feel like my eye lashes make blinking a workout
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
It's not even like I care. He was cute 30lbs ago and before he fucked that Michael Jackson look alike.
did you not get the photos of the finger bruises on my ass?
I drank toilet water last night, I can't answer you because my phone is in rice.
Did I really make him pull over to give the homeless guy my bra?
What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick
Yes I did. Thanks. I was actually an hour and half early. I'm better at public transport than I thought. Guy behind me on the bus is also crying. We compared cry-snot. It was nice in a weird sad way.
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
Her name was Danica but I felt like it would be hard to say drunk so I called her Shelby
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
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