We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
I still can't believe I found a dildo in my ceiling today.
before you smothered your pizza in mayo you blotted it with a napkin saying you were trying to watch your fat intake
I just got home. Seriously all I remember is taking out my contacts and putting your balls in my mouth.
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
Hey, I didn't ask that stripper to put her unds in my mouth, it was just covered by the plus package fee I ordered.
I had phone sex with a retiree last night. This is not how I envisioned my 20s going...
True love: he brought me a margarita while was in the shower. He's a keeper.
He made the Waffle House lady get me out of the car. This isn't a joke.
Why is "Oprah of drinks" written on my arms?
You said to write it on you, after you kept saying, "You get a drink, you get a drink, everyone gets a drink."
90% sure I just opened a snapchat of you in a fuzzy bathrobe next to your ceiling collapsing
He kept saying "i'm lost" while he was sitting on his couch...
Hammered...8am...why is there chickens in the living room?
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