i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
i just burped and it tasted like condom. please tell me i wasn't lame and made that guy wear one for a bj last night.
Now that you're back together are you gonna tell him you set his stuff on fire?
Does anyone know why "math wizard" is written on my arm?
Just blew my age on the breathalyzer. I also have 8 stitches in my head. So worth a .22 though. All time record.
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
I danced on the street to dubstep on a boombox for an hour with a lesbian single mother.
I'm at his house right now making him pancakes to compensate for YOU not giving him a handjob last night. You're welcome.
I feel as though my head has drastically changed shape
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
I had sex with a boy who lives in a closet, that's like having sex with Harry Potter, right?
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
I may or may not be drinking in a church parking lot.
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
Randomize
