Oh shit, I think we need to get you a hobby that doesn't include penises
On my way home right now. I miss you. let's cuddle. whiskey.
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
I'm handcuffed to the toilet. Don't ask
I dont think that yelling at the medic "Christmas is gone, fuck off santa" was the best idea when you couldnt feel your legs.
if you had such a terrible roommate you would understand. jacking off in his conditioner is just the start.
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
People dont know what to do when a naked fat guy is running towards them. they panic
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
It's six am and her daughter just walked in on her mom and roomful of naked people playing strip spoons. glad Im apart of that childhood memory....
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
My boss and I ended up at the same strip club. We both got lap dances while talking about work.
I can't be sure but I think I slept with a clown last night...
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