You know whats sad? As I walk past the campus daycare i cant help think, look at those drunk mistakes
I managed to convince him it was his fault I cheated on him...he spent the last 40 minutes going down on me. I feel legendary.
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
I think they called the cops after 15 minutes of you shaking their clothes line like the ultimate warrior and calling out hulk hogan
Ecstasy should be its own food group.
I'm super stoned watching the vatican smoke cam. Come over.
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
Standing here wondering if its a good idea to cook pork chops in the toaster or not.
She just asked to come over. She's either going to bring one of her dads guns and kill me or we're going to end up having insane lesbian sex.
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
She told me she loves wine, but hates the mud butt the next day. Dude, way to much info on a second date.
He asked when the last time I had sex was. I had to look at the clock and respond "12 hours ago"
To describe how high he was he said, " I'm cocked out of my ape sandwich" so yes...that was some pretty good weed.
he invited me over. we listened to jazz, smoked weed, then cerebrally fucked each other over a three hour game of chess
We're going to watch the inauguration and fuck. Or fuck and watch the inauguration, I'm not picky, just get your ass over here by ten.
Randomize
