i think my tv is drunk
think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
It happened again. Now theres even more baby powder and its all over the place, I'm not cleaning that house.
He honestly told me my belt was "supercute" when we started hooking up. I would be the girl to find the only straight man in the world that uses the word "supercute".
of all the people in our graduating class, this is exactly who would get pregnant.
THERE WAS A HANDPRINT OF BLOOD ON HIS SHOULDER
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
Too lazy to get out of my bed thats 2 feet away from you. Are you sure youre alright?
1 be hot 2 flirt with everyone 3 use hotness to make people do things for you. It's a simple model.
By the end of the night I was using him as a leg rest and he was handing me pizza rolls when I wiggled my hand. It's a proven method.
Well, I convinced myself I had a sixth toe and then I ripped it off. So I PRAY you're doing better than me.
It's Saturday night and I'm sitting on my couch by myself, watching Glee, and drinking gin and tonics. If you listen very closely, you can hear the wails of my mother giving up hope that I will ever give her a son-in-law.
I'm hungover from arbor mist I'm so white
I think we can say happy hour is successful when you have frosting and southern comfort in your hair.
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
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