I think someone spiked my drink last night. .. Like all 20 of them.
lesson #67 learned in college: a three day old margarita, is still a margarita.
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
I found the other part of your tooth if you want to put it under your pillow
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
What's the rule on cocaine before dinner?
Its 11 o'clock somewhere
Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
in honor of breaking bad starting soon, i am now banging a walter white lookalike. viva heisenberg!
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
Dude, she had a pound of gunpowder in her closet. I for sure got a fear boner.
There's nothing classy about a pregnant girl at a frat party...remember that.
i buy too many watermelons when I'm drunk
This is my life. Currently ordering a gift for my straight married girlfriend's husband from my lesbian married girlfriend.
Randomize
