and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...
bleeding from the face, sitting in a shopping cart and holding a wad of ripped caution tape. what else would i be doing?
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
Just saw identical twins riding scooters. Today is not real who the hell rides a scooter anymore
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
FML I accidentally sent the text about his bruised balls as a group text that included his brother and my boss.
Lo siento on account of my penis...
How do you explain to your mom that you let your friend stab you in the leg while drunk and high on coke?
He kept saying "Welcome to Indianapolis" over and over while we were having sex...because that's his hometown. I was scared and confused... I didn't know if I should have said thank you or what.
I woke up with glitter and eggshells in my bed wtf
While he was fucking me, he just stopped and said, "Mike says Hi." Then proceeded to fuck me.
What did you do?
What do you say to that!? But, when I came, I screamed out my full name.
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
Randomize
