Raise your hand if you bought 2 annoying girls shots of water. CLOWNS.
my ex just saw me in his brothers bed. fuck yes revenge feels good
there's got to be a less slutty way to tell him the baby isn't his
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
I thought I walked in on an orgy of smurfs. Man I love shrooms
...But it's not like we would be the first people to pay for an abortion with student loans and cell phone rebates.
screw it, I'll just be a stripper until next August when then are looking for suitable teachers to teach the future of America. it's like a feel good movie just a little out of order and im a dude.
I have hit nutritional rock bottom I am spreading peanut butter on to lays potato chips
Not sure why, but I was running back and forth across the road. Cab hit me and gave us a free ride home.
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
My heart stopped for a sec, but I snorted what I believe was cocaine off the floor, and I'm back in the fight
Trying to roll joints on a seadoo in the middle of a lake on a windy night. -Juststonerthings
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
"They won't do it. I'm in the middle of darkness. " and "Probably going to die. I've been walking for 50 minutes in one direction" are the last texts I got from Steve
Randomize
