this girl is running around outside screaming, it's creaming on me! it's creaming on me. I totally have to find my video camera
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
I just told him that with every paper, I'd take a picture of myself with one less piece of clothing. Who say's I can't be a tutor?
i love how you just walk into that dealer's house every time without knocking, yet you don't even know his name
Successfully put eye drops in while driving with my glasses on. Stoner level: expert
I'll pay you back with progressively deviant sexual favors.
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
there's a 50/50 chance the night will end in alcohol-induced rituals of satanic nature
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
I turned on Elf, made myself a mojito, and am eating one of a sleeve of Ritz. You tell me if I wanna go out tonight.
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
I blacked out after the piñata full of condoms
Randomize
