i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
just caught my little brother jacking off the family pet
I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
My roommate found me crawling down the hallway as she was on her way to her morning class. Its time for a new semester.
after eating me out, he asked for something to drink. i gave him a glass of water and he said he needed something stronger.
So I'm probably the first guy in history to tap out of a blowjob.
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
This juggling 3 dicks is getting exhausting
That makes 14 Xmas cards already! Middle aged people are really nice to their dealers.
Considering we're about to fuck, I really need your girlfriend to stop liking all my Facebook posts.
Ehh, the third backed out. Two still isn't bad. Who gets a bootycall to pick them up from a bootycall's house anyways? Only me.
as i was trying not to drunkingly fall off her toliet, i noticed her socks laying there. i quickly grabbed them, ran upstairs, and excitingly asked her if she had gotten them at sams club. she replied with, "...those are your socks."
Randomize
