so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
I'm standing in line at the liquor store and they're making popcorn.
I feel miserable and there's nutella all over my phone
Because you work where i will be drunk tonight I'm asking you. Is a shirt required on Halloween?
I just...no. You make my soul cry. You are giving me karma-cancer. This torture of my majesticness can no longer be tolerated.
Do you think next time you could control the yawn? Kind of a buzzkill to be mid-orgasm and see you yawning over there.
Yup, found the vomit in the side compartment. My bad.
After the apocalypse all we'll have is vodka and twinkles.
Wow I got tittyfucked by the American Dream
Come eat Chinese buffet and watch us trip on acid. It'll be fun.
passed out on bart again and decide to bike home. biked thru a goat farm of angry goats, biked on the freeway, got stopped by the cops, and sat shotgun in the squad car while the officer driving got a video on his iphone of his partner riding my bike on the freeway.
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
I see more hoeing in ur future
Randomize
