I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
maybe it wasnt such a good idea to pregame our lease signing...
can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
that awkward moment when your booty call gets snowed in at your place.
They can't keep moving my court date back, i dont know if I'll survive another one of these going away to jail parties.
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
She busted her face in a tragic twerking accident. Marking the 2nd time I have peed my pants laughing.
I reek of latex and grilled onions.
Mission accomplished.
fuck it. from now on whatever room i wake up in, i'm stealing clothes from. this walk of shame shit is too much without pants
What happened to fro yo and sex?
I was having a serious heart-to-heart, and then the weed gummy kicked in.
chasing tequila with frosting. best baby shower ever.
It involves me, my best friend, and a stripper and her mother.
With each thrust he'd whisper "like a ninja." Should I be flattered or appalled?
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