I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
Seeing him suck some chick's face on VH1 wasn't exactly how I imagined the "we should see other people" conversation going.
apparently he thought telling me 'the weasel wants to come out to play' would somehow convince me to go down on him
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
Eating this pizza pocket is like eating out god
Lemme guess, I was the one completely shit faced making out with the 50 year old...
LOL, wrong number bro. Good luck trying to figure out what happened though..
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
i thought you were just a really comfy body pillow until i sobered up. oops.
Hey. Im sorry to bother you but I just watched the seinfield episode about faking an orgasm and it caused me to second guess myself. Were you satisfied?
okay yeah but you've seen me eat jambalaya naked
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
I'm getting 800 nuggets from McDonald's
You know youre getting old when you I.D. the person trying to take you home to be sure they're over 25. Help me.
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
Randomize
