It was kinda bitchy last night when i brought up my pregnancy scare and you said "shotty playing with it"
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
Your "OraGel will numb anything" theory was the worst thing I ever believed in.
I poured everyones drinks into the ice bucket and then stuck my face in it. Apparently I'm a greedy drunk.
He asked me to spit in his mouth. I did. Never let me hook up with this guy again.
Ps I got my nipple pierced. You're just gonna have to accept me for the tool I am and I don't wanna hear any shenanigans.
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
Does it qualify as sexting if you're both pretending to be fictional characters?
I'm not sure whether to be proud of you or weirded out.
I AM A HOUSE CAT. I CANNOT DO THIS LION BUSINESS WE CALL THE SINGLE LIFE
Your resume just got faxed, I also modified it a bit and sent it to strip clubs...expect weird phone calls...
The teenager outdrank all of us. All. Of. Us. I woke up and she was getting everyone water and fruit snacks. I give up.
Xanax and cookies, it's good to be home
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
He fucked me so hard my contacts fell out! Didnt know that was possible.
Randomize